Where are my keys???

So I did it again today. Locked my keys in my car....while it was running....for over an hour. Okay, stop laughing now. This is really the second time I've done this, only this time I was "smart" enough to actually lock the door. Last time I apparantly just got up out of the car and went into the store, to return to my UNLOCKED running car. At least I bothered to actually park it and didn't just pull up and run in for a shopping trip.

So my solution...you know that thing that you tether yourself to when you are on a treadmill, so that in case you somehow fall off the thing, it automatically shuts off - yea, I need that for the car. Just a little tether strap around my wrist, so when I get out of the car, the keys come with me. That, or I need that keyless start on a NEW CAR. If only something would happen to my car now so that I could get a new car....hmmm.....clearly the criminals around here can't take a hint. Guess I need to leave a sign that says TAKE ME, I'M ALREADY RUNNING AND GASED UP!

Ladies Only

I've got some super romance tips for you ladies out there...Not so much things "to" do as things "not" to do.

1. some men are allergic to rose petals - so when you sprinkle them all over the sheets - husband could get a very red and annoying body rash - MOOD KILLER.

2. 15+ candles burning on glass shelves agaist a mirror may create a romantic mood, but also may eventually blow up at the worst time leaving you to spend the rest of the night cleaning glass shards from your carpet. NOT ROMANTIC

3. during "romance" time - all dogs should be locked out of the room because a fluffy white dog sniffing your husband's hiney is not a turn on...and if it is...you have bigger problems. DOG SNIFFING - NOT A TURN ON.

On a side note, if you need a reason to get out of the "romance"...lately I've been telling my husband that Punxatawny Phil saw his shadow and so will be hybernating for another several weeks - so we will not be seeing him anytime soon. It's a hybernation thing - can't mess with nature.

Oh wait, Punxatawny Phil is a ground hog, not a BEAVER! Darn, better go shave my legs.

one cool superhero

Spiderman Undies, plus new pirate sword, plus new green and black cowboys boots equals one cute superhero. FYI - that is ALL he is wearing and he is dancing to my new iTunes - Rihanna - "Shut up and drive". Funny thing is that the one time I went to a male strip club, I think the dancers were wearing the same get-up. Not cute on them...

Don't be jealous, but...

My family is break dancin to Freak Nasty's Da Dip...right now.

remember, "you put your hand upon my hip, when I dip you dip we dip"

Got to love Christmastime - what?

Thank you Secret Santa for Health!!

I love my gift and was so surprised when I found it outside my door one day. Very sneaky Santa.

Thanks again!!

i am THAT mom

I just found myself screaming this to Carson as I was washing dishes:

Carson...Carson...Carson - don't stand so close to the T.V., get your hands out of your pants and let the dog out!!

It took 3 "Carsons" to get him to turn around from watching rudolph on t.v. and when he turned around, i saw his hands down his pants - meanwhile Duke is clawing at the back door.

we did spend some quality time making brownies together for my work Christmas party tomorrow night - so this night wasn't a total mess.

time to call jenny

So, if I lay down flat on my bed, suck in all of my breath and don't breathe for about 3 minutes - I can zip up my FAT jeans. I'm afraid if I actually stood up, the button would pop off, fly across the room and knock out Carson's eye. Good luck explaining that to the ER. So I'm heading out in sweat pants - AGAIN. Don't be jealous.

sugar rush!

Don't be jealous but when Carson and I got home from family fun time with the Powell's at around 10pm last night - I got to clean up a whole bag of sugar that was ALL over my kitchen floor. And just FYI - sugar is not that easy to clean up. I had the brand new bag of sugar and a bag of chocolate chips out to make cookies today. Yes, you guessed it - Duke got a hold of it. You would think I would have learned my lesson after Duke ate our pumpkin bread off of the counter - but nope - I'm a slow learner. I didn't have to clean up any chocolate chips though because Duke ate them all. I called Brad right away to gripe and get sympathy and he was worried about Duke eating all of that chocolate. Whatever! If he dies - then at least he died eating chocolate, not the worst way to go, especially considering what I wanted to do to him right then.

Well, we got most of it cleaned up and saved the really bad stuff for Brad to clean up today since he didn't get home until 3:00 am. There is about a pound of sugar in Duke's cage right now...

I'm still waiting for Duke's sugar high to crash. He was so bad all night running around, barking, wanting in and out. It was kind of funny - okay - not it wasn't - I was tired and just wanted him to leave me alone.

So, if you want any cookies from me - feel free to come lick my kitchen floor because I'm not sure I'll ever get all of it up.

don't be jealous....

Don't be jealous but, I have lots to be thankful for...

Okay - so as I'm reading every one's sweet Thanksgiving blog - I thought I should show a "serious" side of me before I post all the nonsense of the Thanksgiving holiday!!

I'm thankful for:

My husband that does so much for us and loves so deeply and unconditionally.

My precious Carson for his laughter, love and cuddles when I can get them.

My family - extended family too that welcomes everyone with open arms & allows me to have my crazy sense of humor without banishing me from the family.

Okay, that is all I could think of that I was thankful for...(i couldn't be completely serious)

hmmm?

sorry about that last post. it was from Pierre, my 8 year old Bichon Frise. shame on him!! he knows he is banned from the computer ever since we found him googling "doggie style". at least Brad said it was him. hmmm, now i wonder?!?